plume now scratches the screen at

{Friday, March 05, 2004}

to beat around the bush with a semaphor : a semi-aphoristic response to a bush campaign ad

1. bush wants to cash-in on september 11 and casts himself as the hero saving the nation.

he would be more convincing if he were dead.

2. again on the appropriation of images :: after all, historical battles are fought for the proprietorship of history.

3. we are truly ambushed.

4. bush administration? :: let’s do our best to have something else administered than bush.

5. the nation has suffered enough indigestion.

6. indignation!

7. have your next president packaged and delivered to your door in your favorite format.

the doormat format.

8. bushes make bristly shoewipes.

9. the real issue of the debate is :: should WMD’s be sold over or under the counter?

10. as soon as they find them.

11. and the flag lagged behind.

it was well-travelled and had a jet-lag.

12. bush truly is a believer :: he still believes in WMD’s even though he knows they don’t exist.

13. well, in his next term, he’ll invade another country and maybe get lucky.

14. what “next term”?

15. there are countries in which no vote is needed to be reelected.

16. a computer expert explained on the radio, over a year ago, how to rig an electronic voting machine and still obtain correct sample-test results.

17. errors start where arms don’t reach.

18. make sure your hands count.

19. ‘tis the season when the bush disguises as a travelling salesman. his ad-stand’s got it all: look, here a child, there an old woman, here a black person, there a nascar dad, here a married couple, there a coupled martian, here a tree, there an oil rig. “come all who seek, cure for gold teeth, potion for baldness, ointment for blindness, miracle for lameness, come all who suffer!”

20. image is mightier than a missile.

help your neighbor build a shelter.

21. … while the music was inspirational

22. bush called god for support.

let’s remember: god also supported the crusades and the inquisition.

23. “and now, let’s repeat this in five seldom used languages, like Spanish.

perhaps the voters will be so happy to be spoken to they won’t pay attention to what is said.”

24. on the environment :: where bushes grow there forests have long turned to lumber.

25. on women’s rights, gays’ rights, blacks’ rights, immigrants’ rights, etc :: bush promises to commemorate them once he’s had them all abolished.

26. on foreign and domestic policy :: domestic police in foreign countries

27. on freedom of religion :: “believe what you will as long as you come to my church.”

28. on privacy :: “everyone deserves to have his protected as long as it’s public.”

29. on equitable trials :: “in America, every defendant has the right to attorney, unless we’ve transferred him somewhere else.”

30. question, two months into bush’s second term :: “have you met any of your electoral commitments?”

answer, three hours later :: “i invented that word only eighteen minutes ago.”

31. what “second term?”

32. get a bearing on bush before bush gets his bearings.

plumed @ 12:06 AM | 0 comments



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est. feb. 5, 2004 A.D.

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